It's So Sad
by Bubblebumgirl
Summary: My Dad's pathetic interpretation of Anime (Please read, it's real funny!)
1. Default Chapter

It's So Sad  
  
Hello out there in readerland. A few days ago I was talking to my Dad in the car about my favorite animes. Since we'd talked about them before he knew the basic idea of some of them. Or so I thought.... Here is a basic reenactment of what happened. Remember these events however unbelievable are true.  
  
BBG = Me  
  
Dad = My dad (duh!)  
  
BBG: So, how much do you remember about the Animes I was telling you about?  
  
Dad: Oh, I think I remember a lot! Let me see. There's one, it's called, uh ... the Yoo-Yoo Haka Show! Right?  
  
BBG: *Glares fiercely* Close enough.  
  
Dad: Okay, let's see. That's the show that has the main character named Yuskay, right?  
  
BBG: Yeah.... (It's spelled Yusuke, Dad)  
  
Dad: Okay, here's what I know about Yusuke. He's, um, he's a half-demon. He's got the head of a dog and the body of a human. Am I close?  
  
BBG: WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!? INUYASHA'S THE HALF-DEMON AND HE'S ON A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT SHOW! (plus he doesn't have the head of a dog just the ears.)  
  
Dad: Oh. Well, then, Yusuke must be that other one. Uh, you know, that one who fights the demons, right?  
  
BBG: So far.  
  
Dad: Yes!! All right, so Yusuke is a demon-fighter. He's human, and he has some friends that fight with him. One of them is a girl. She's in love with him. Her name is, uh, Kato!  
  
BBG: First of all her name is Keiko and she doesn't really fight...  
  
Dad: All right, she's just his girlfriend, and she keeps getting kidnapped by demons, so he has to climb down a well into the Underworld to rescue her. And he's got some other friends who come with him, like, uh, Boton! I know that's right.  
  
BBG: Yeah she is always getting kidnapped.  
  
Dad: Really? I just made that up!  
  
BBG: *Rolls eyes* Anyway that's the whole reason I wrote A Wish under my other pen name ShadowgirlVG. But she doesn't go to the underworld and it's Kagome who goes through the well. Can you tell me who Kagome is?  
  
Dad: Oh, yeah, I've got that one figured out. Kagome is the daughter of this other woman, Kikkiko, who used to be some kind of Priestess, but then she died and her body got a jewel stuck in it, until she was reincarnated, except her soul was sucked out and put in Kagome, only Kagumi didn't want an extra soul, so she sent it back, only then Kiikkii was already dead, so there was no place for the soul to go. Meanwhile, Inuyasha is in love with both of them, except since Kikiki is basically dead, he prefers Kagomi now. And Inuyasha is a dog.  
  
BBG: WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!? (I'm sorry but I must say this again.)  
  
Dad: Okay, I know, Inuyasha only has dog ears, and teeth, and lungs, and toenails, and a few other unmentionable parts. But anyway he's a half-dog- demon, but for some unknown reason Kugimi falls in love with him, maybe because she's only got half a soul. But they also hate each other, because this other demon (I think it was a Cat demon) made them send nasty e-mails to each other. Or something like that.  
  
BBG: Oy, I don't know where to start. How do you think they could get e- mail in an alternate version of feudal Japan?  
  
Dad: Well, okay, they sent nasty parchments to each other.  
  
BBG: *pause* I'll just ignore that one. And just so you know, Kagome is not Kikiyo's daughter, she's the Reincarnation of her. And Inuyasha loves Kikiyo, not Kagome.  
  
Dad: Well, they're basically the same person. And I thought that Kikiyo is dead, so how could he love her, except maybe a picture of her or something?  
  
BBG: Um, they don't have pictures there, either.  
  
Dad: Fine, a sand drawing of her.  
  
BBG: *sweat drop* Okay, even though Kikiyo is dead, she was brought back to life by a witch. Because Kikiyo was cremated, the witch had to make her a new body out of her ashes and clay.  
  
Dad: Oh yeah, she's going to hold together real well...  
  
BBG: It was fired! Anyway, she temporarily took out Kagome's soul, to make her new Kikiyo complete.  
  
Dad: What did Kikiyo do for a soul in the meantime?  
  
BBG: Nothing, she was just an empty body.  
  
Dad: That must have been fun for Inuyasha.  
  
BBG: Oh, never mind. But then Kagome's body brought her soul back. Since Kikiyo thought Inuyasha had betrayed her - long story -  
  
Dad: That's the one with the nasty sand drawings?  
  
BBG: sure... - she hated Inuyasha, and the only thing that kept her alive once her soul was gone was her complete hatred of him.  
  
Dad: All right, now I'm totally confused. Let's see, Kigimi was made out of Kikiki's ashes, but then Kikiki was reincarnated out of mud, and they kept bouncing their soul back and forth between them. Inuyasha loves Kikiki but she's only kept alive by how much she hates him, and meanwhile Kagami loves, no, hates, no, loves Inuyasha, because he ... what, because he's got dog ears??  
  
BBG: No.... Okay, let's switch topics, we're not getting anywhere on this one. Do you know what the Shikon jewel is?  
  
Dad: Yes, that's the one that's stuck in Kikiko's belly button.  
  
BBG: *spits up water* No, it was jewel she was protecting. It was burned with her body, which is why it was in Kagome's body, when the centipede bit it out of her.  
  
Dad: Ouch. I hate when that happens. But as I recall, it was Kakiyak who first found the jewel. Some tribe of natives was worshipping it, and she showed up and said, "Hey, I'm a jewel-protecting Priestess, you got any evil jewel's you need protected?" And they were dumb enough to believe her, so they gave it to her, without even checking her Priestess license or anything.  
  
BBG: *shakes head sadly* Okay, skip that, let's try something else. What other characters do you know in Inuyasha?  
  
Dad: Let's see, I know there's a whole bunch of bums who follow him around when he fights demons. There's, uh, that guy whose name begins with a "G" ... Gerontis?  
  
BBG: Okay, there's NO ONE on that show whose name starts with a "G"  
  
Dad: You know the one I'm talking about. The pervert, the one who's always trying to get Inuyasha's girlfriends to have his children.  
  
BBG: That's Miroku.  
  
Dad: G, M, what's the difference? Anyway, why is he interested in girls made out of ashes with jewels up their butts, huh?  
  
BBG: Um, he doesn't like Kikiyo, as far as I know.  
  
Dad: Okay, then there's this other dude, his name is, um Sandro or something.  
  
BBG: You mean Sango?  
  
Dad: Yeah, he's a monkey, right?  
  
BBG: WHAT!? SHE'S A HUMAN GIRL! She throws a giant boomerang.  
  
Dad: Oh, and I remember something else. That Boton character has a giant ironing board, or something, right?  
  
BBG: Um, it's a paddle, Dad.  
  
Dad: Oh, well she hits people with it, and flies around on it like a broom, right?  
  
BBG: Yeah.  
  
Dad: Yess!! Okay, now there's at least one or two other characters that I remember. There's another girl, who washes dishes a lot. Her name is, uh, Susie. Okay, I have no idea.  
  
BBG: Um, that's Sango again, and that's only in my fic, Inuyasha meets Yusuke (also under my other pen name, for those interested).  
  
Dad: Fine, what does Sango do, if she doesn't wash dishes or swing from trees? I mean, besides hitting people with her boomerang?  
  
BBG: She helps fight demons!  
  
Dad: I would think that after a while the demons would start to realize when a boomerang was coming at them, and just reach up and catch it. Then she'd be out of a job, wouldn't she?  
  
BBG: Well, demons are stupid, and I think the boomerang is sharp.  
  
Dad: I have another question. Where do all these demons come from? And why are they always kidnapping girls?  
  
BBG: No one knows, it just makes a good show.  
  
Dad: And why doesn't the Army or the Air Force just bomb the heck out of the demon caves, and be done with it?  
  
BBG: They have no air force or army, well maybe an army, just no bombs. They're still in the age of swords.  
  
Dad: So fine, stab the caves with swords. Anyway, is Inuyasha like the only person out there who has a clue about these demons? Or is he just the only one that they pick on, so he's got to go out and fight them every day, while everyone else just goes about their daily business, completely ignoring the demons?  
  
BBG: No, they know they're there. It's just, they're humans, and their weak, and they can't fight them. Inuyasha does that, although he's not happy about it.  
  
Dad: Just hypothetically, what would happen if, say, Inuyasha decided he didn't feel like fighting any demons this week?  
  
BBG: Kagome would probably say "Sit" a lot, and Miroku and Sango would take over.  
  
Dad: Excuse me? "Sit"?  
  
BBG: He has a special necklace that, whenever she says "Sit", it makes him crash into the ground.  
  
Dad: And this is the woman who hates his guts?  
  
BBG: It's a love-hate relationship.  
  
Dad: Yeah, I hear you... So because he's half dog, and wearing this "magic dog collar", all she has to do is say "Sit", and he crashes down. What happens when she says "Roll over!"?  
  
BBG: Nothing.  
  
Dad: "Stay"? "Play dead"? "Don't pee on the carpet!"?  
  
BBG: Nope, just sit.  
  
Dad: Cheap dog collar. So you're telling me that if this great super Dog- Demon starts getting tired of fighting off all the demons, he's going to just lie down and lick himself, and the fate of the world is going to be decided by a girl with no soul who's made of muddy ashes and a dish-washing monkey?  
  
BBG: *opens her mouth, pauses, shakes her head*  
  
And that is how it went. Literally. Dad came in to type his stuff. If you want to yell at him, I'll pass on any e-mails to him. If I don't kill him first....  
  
Bye, I'm off to camp for a month, see you in August! 


	2. The Doom to Come

OK this isn't really another chapter but I wanted to let you all know a sequel is coming soon. This time of Ranma ½...... 


End file.
